Leaning against a serenitree, canted at just the right angle to see the land and sky without moving. The patience of nature calming me.
A fine mist falls. Hardly enough to dampen my upturned face. I hear wind through distant trees and then it arrives. Maple leaves are gently shaken from the twigs to which they cling. They flutter to the ground slowly. There is no hurry here.
I hear the sound of ducks down at the beach and the croak of Brother Raven calling from the top of a nearby tree.
The calm of the tree and the mist and the breeze permeate my roiling emotions and a deep sigh emanates from my chest.
This is where I belong. I am at peace in nature. There’s no fear here. No desire. Only being.
The rain increases and I decide that being dry is the better part of valor.
I stop at an evergreen Huckleberry bush with its tiny fruit a color of blue so dark, as to be almost black. To pick enough for a pie would be a labor of love but a taste like no other makes picking a small handful worth my while.
I see a familiar fern growing out of the moss on a huge Maple tree. I dig in the moss for a bit of the root that, when touched to the tip of my tongue, tastes of sweet licorice.
I return home. Reluctantly leaving my true element behind.
If so, please consider clicking the above link and liking the Notes post—leave a comment or even share within your own community. Poetry lives on in the minds of hearts of writers, it breathes on the page.
Your voice can be heard among the starry illuminations, howling at the moon.
Hi Carrie! First time reading your work and it really resonated...spoke to my condition. I appreciate the silence afforded to me when serving as head lighthouse keeper at an offshore lighthouse. On occasion, I am left alone at the lighthouse. For safety reasons, we try not to do that, but on occasion the returning boat needing to embark on a 20 mile journey is canceled or turned back due to changing weather. When left alone like this, I listen to the lighthouse, the water, the wind, the clouds, the stars, and my soul. They all speak without uttering a word, so I wait in quiet - unable to improve upon the silence.
Carrie this was very deep and meaningful for me. Being in silence is very therapeutic and does wonders for soul and spirit.
The practice you have shared is one that I have used when I need to calm my anxiety. I call it the 5,4,3,2,1 Calm method. In between each step you would take a deep breath as well. I wrestle with anxiety as well as depression and the the methods you share I keep deep in my heart. Friend you speak to my condition. Thank you for being you!!
Your words, a gentle balm to my heart, profoundly spoke my condition today. Immense gratitude to you for cultivating this space in the world, for me and so many others.
Yours is an important voice that I want to welcome over and over in my mind. Thank you!
Hi Carrie, blessings to you. I love being in nature. It opens my heart and soul to sacred energy and love. I am fortunate to live in a small home, but I have a yard that is full of nature which touches all my senses. I have evergreens, and deciduous tress, which gives me color all year round, even when autumn takes some of the leaves. We have a numerous variety of birds and wild life, bears, coyote, squirrels, chipmunks, mountain lions and of course dogs and cats who visit from the neighborhood.
The smell of pine and scents of summer are exquisite. I can become silent and contemplative for long periods of time without being bombarded by the noise of my thoughts, just letting go to the peace and joy. Sometimes people say, I'm being too quiet, but I listen a lot and talk when my spirit directs me to engage. I have friends who talk continuously, and even if I want to say something, it's hard to get a chance without interrupting. Sometimes unfortunately, I avoid talking to them on the phone or meeting them because I know they will talk forever, even if I say I need to go. However, I feel they need to talk and I need to listen, but sometimes I wish they would enjoy the silence and relax. Pat
I can't wait to try this practice. I know for myself I do struggle to know when to speak. I wouldn't say it is easier to be silent. Im working on how to speak honestly and without aggression. Sometimes the passion I feel for the topic gets in the way.
Thank you for being so honest about struggling when to know when and how to speak. I know you are not alone in wrestling how to balance, how to be true, when to listen and when to speak. I usually default to love...what would love encourage me to do. What would love look like in this moment. As I said in my post, that doesn't mean I don't sometimes get it wrong, but it does mean I always know its coming from my best intention. I also really get when passion or anger can narrow my ability to discern in the moment. There have been times when I do as Parker J. Palmer suggests...and turn to wonder. you know, "I wonder what the story of this persons life is, the story of why they would come to this opinion that feels so hateful to me." That can help. I also remembering reading about Eli Wiesel, who as an educator and peace advocate worked throughout his life to further open hearted dialogue in the classroom and beyond. But yet he knew and said honestly, that as a survivor of the Holocaust, he could not be in effective dialogue with a Holocaust denier, and refrained from those conversations. Its so personal, and we do the best we can, with all the love we can bring to each situation - which I know you aspire to do every day my friend.
Carrie, as a lone and wandering Quaker at the moment, your words were both fresh and familiar. Your thoughts on silence and sound, speaking and not speaking, merge well with my own recent exploration of the idea of aloneness. Sometimes I desperately want to be alone, sometimes I ache for a sense of total connectedness, and sometimes these needs occur simultaneously. And then I ponder reaching an understanding about separation and Oneness that those concepts are so mutually fulfilled that they in fact disappear. I really hope that makes some sense. :-)
These are such deep and powerful reflections my friend. Sometimes it is in the silence I feel most connected. Sometimes it is the sharing of sound community is found. I often think of myself like a wave that has come up out of the sea. I am an individual wave, here in this moment of light and air. There is a joyousness to being truly myself in this brief time of separateness. But I also know that a wave comes up (and connected to) the great expanse of water. We are born from that mystery and will eventually slip back into mystery again. In the human spirit there can be a longing for the eternal ocean, to belong completely to the expanse again. I don't know...but I feel it is part of the human experience, to rise from a great wild mercy, to always know that mercy is part of me, and to feel gloriously connected and gloriously separate at the same time. silence and sound. connection and individuality. the experience of solitude which is very different than the experience of loneliness.
This was very meaningful to me. It has been awhile since my husband and I lived near a Quaker Meeting, but we attended for many years and found those hours uplifting, inspiring, and filled with love. The issue of a time to speak and a time to be silent is one that matters, always requiring decisions. It reminds me of The first of the Four Agreements from Don Miguel Ruiz: Be impeccable with your word. I'm going to ponder this more today. Thank you.
Its been a while since I've read the Four Agreements. Your post encourages me to pick it up and review the ideas in there again. Yes, Be Impeccable with your word is such a wise encouragement.
Leaning against a serenitree, canted at just the right angle to see the land and sky without moving. The patience of nature calming me.
A fine mist falls. Hardly enough to dampen my upturned face. I hear wind through distant trees and then it arrives. Maple leaves are gently shaken from the twigs to which they cling. They flutter to the ground slowly. There is no hurry here.
I hear the sound of ducks down at the beach and the croak of Brother Raven calling from the top of a nearby tree.
The calm of the tree and the mist and the breeze permeate my roiling emotions and a deep sigh emanates from my chest.
This is where I belong. I am at peace in nature. There’s no fear here. No desire. Only being.
The rain increases and I decide that being dry is the better part of valor.
I stop at an evergreen Huckleberry bush with its tiny fruit a color of blue so dark, as to be almost black. To pick enough for a pie would be a labor of love but a taste like no other makes picking a small handful worth my while.
I see a familiar fern growing out of the moss on a huge Maple tree. I dig in the moss for a bit of the root that, when touched to the tip of my tongue, tastes of sweet licorice.
I return home. Reluctantly leaving my true element behind.
Fine writer and reader of Substack—we are starting a movement to get a poetry section added to the platform. Can I ask, are you with us?
https://substack.com/profile/10309929-david/note/c-15579327
If so, please consider clicking the above link and liking the Notes post—leave a comment or even share within your own community. Poetry lives on in the minds of hearts of writers, it breathes on the page.
Your voice can be heard among the starry illuminations, howling at the moon.
Thank you for your time and support.
Love and appreciation,
David
Hi Carrie, I'm so excited that you're traveling to the ark in Ann Arbor. I can't wait to hear you live again.
Hi Carrie! First time reading your work and it really resonated...spoke to my condition. I appreciate the silence afforded to me when serving as head lighthouse keeper at an offshore lighthouse. On occasion, I am left alone at the lighthouse. For safety reasons, we try not to do that, but on occasion the returning boat needing to embark on a 20 mile journey is canceled or turned back due to changing weather. When left alone like this, I listen to the lighthouse, the water, the wind, the clouds, the stars, and my soul. They all speak without uttering a word, so I wait in quiet - unable to improve upon the silence.
Friend Carrie speaks to my condition.
I feel you really hit on one of the central tensions in life. When to speak and when to choose silence. Beautifully written!
Carrie this was very deep and meaningful for me. Being in silence is very therapeutic and does wonders for soul and spirit.
The practice you have shared is one that I have used when I need to calm my anxiety. I call it the 5,4,3,2,1 Calm method. In between each step you would take a deep breath as well. I wrestle with anxiety as well as depression and the the methods you share I keep deep in my heart. Friend you speak to my condition. Thank you for being you!!
Your words, a gentle balm to my heart, profoundly spoke my condition today. Immense gratitude to you for cultivating this space in the world, for me and so many others.
Yours is an important voice that I want to welcome over and over in my mind. Thank you!
Thank you Guri, your kind words touch my heart deeply. blessings my friend.
Hi Carrie, blessings to you. I love being in nature. It opens my heart and soul to sacred energy and love. I am fortunate to live in a small home, but I have a yard that is full of nature which touches all my senses. I have evergreens, and deciduous tress, which gives me color all year round, even when autumn takes some of the leaves. We have a numerous variety of birds and wild life, bears, coyote, squirrels, chipmunks, mountain lions and of course dogs and cats who visit from the neighborhood.
The smell of pine and scents of summer are exquisite. I can become silent and contemplative for long periods of time without being bombarded by the noise of my thoughts, just letting go to the peace and joy. Sometimes people say, I'm being too quiet, but I listen a lot and talk when my spirit directs me to engage. I have friends who talk continuously, and even if I want to say something, it's hard to get a chance without interrupting. Sometimes unfortunately, I avoid talking to them on the phone or meeting them because I know they will talk forever, even if I say I need to go. However, I feel they need to talk and I need to listen, but sometimes I wish they would enjoy the silence and relax. Pat
I can't wait to try this practice. I know for myself I do struggle to know when to speak. I wouldn't say it is easier to be silent. Im working on how to speak honestly and without aggression. Sometimes the passion I feel for the topic gets in the way.
Thank you for being so honest about struggling when to know when and how to speak. I know you are not alone in wrestling how to balance, how to be true, when to listen and when to speak. I usually default to love...what would love encourage me to do. What would love look like in this moment. As I said in my post, that doesn't mean I don't sometimes get it wrong, but it does mean I always know its coming from my best intention. I also really get when passion or anger can narrow my ability to discern in the moment. There have been times when I do as Parker J. Palmer suggests...and turn to wonder. you know, "I wonder what the story of this persons life is, the story of why they would come to this opinion that feels so hateful to me." That can help. I also remembering reading about Eli Wiesel, who as an educator and peace advocate worked throughout his life to further open hearted dialogue in the classroom and beyond. But yet he knew and said honestly, that as a survivor of the Holocaust, he could not be in effective dialogue with a Holocaust denier, and refrained from those conversations. Its so personal, and we do the best we can, with all the love we can bring to each situation - which I know you aspire to do every day my friend.
As St. Benedict instructs in his Rule for monastics and those who follow him: “Listen with the ear of your heart.”
I love that Carney...thank you for posting.
I want to read this again and again. And again. Thank you.
Carrie, as a lone and wandering Quaker at the moment, your words were both fresh and familiar. Your thoughts on silence and sound, speaking and not speaking, merge well with my own recent exploration of the idea of aloneness. Sometimes I desperately want to be alone, sometimes I ache for a sense of total connectedness, and sometimes these needs occur simultaneously. And then I ponder reaching an understanding about separation and Oneness that those concepts are so mutually fulfilled that they in fact disappear. I really hope that makes some sense. :-)
These are such deep and powerful reflections my friend. Sometimes it is in the silence I feel most connected. Sometimes it is the sharing of sound community is found. I often think of myself like a wave that has come up out of the sea. I am an individual wave, here in this moment of light and air. There is a joyousness to being truly myself in this brief time of separateness. But I also know that a wave comes up (and connected to) the great expanse of water. We are born from that mystery and will eventually slip back into mystery again. In the human spirit there can be a longing for the eternal ocean, to belong completely to the expanse again. I don't know...but I feel it is part of the human experience, to rise from a great wild mercy, to always know that mercy is part of me, and to feel gloriously connected and gloriously separate at the same time. silence and sound. connection and individuality. the experience of solitude which is very different than the experience of loneliness.
I appreciate the wave analogy, and add it to my pondering.
Some of my most intimate prayers to the Lord were ones without words.
ah yes. Thank you Richard. lovely way to express prayer.
This was very meaningful to me. It has been awhile since my husband and I lived near a Quaker Meeting, but we attended for many years and found those hours uplifting, inspiring, and filled with love. The issue of a time to speak and a time to be silent is one that matters, always requiring decisions. It reminds me of The first of the Four Agreements from Don Miguel Ruiz: Be impeccable with your word. I'm going to ponder this more today. Thank you.
Its been a while since I've read the Four Agreements. Your post encourages me to pick it up and review the ideas in there again. Yes, Be Impeccable with your word is such a wise encouragement.
Carrie,
Love you, your thoughts and an invitation to reflect with Mother Nature . ❤️🙏❤️