The Quiet End Of The Table

Photo by v2osk on Unsplash

Last evening I was sitting with family and friends in a small boat in a calm cove on a fresh water Indiana lake. We were waiting until it was full dark for the annual Monroe/Brown County fireworks display that happens over the 4th of July weekend. We chatted in the kinds of low tones one tends to use at sunset. We laughed and told stories while sharing fruit and pretzels and Fritos. Finally the sun slipped below the tree line on the west end of the lake. The sky lit up with stunning shades of deep lilac purple, cerulean blue, Nehi soda orange and magenta. A large white cloud, I swear in the shape of a bird in flight, was lit from beneath, creating a bright silver lining that edged its belly and wings. A procession of very real and elegant blue herons passed over head, looking for a roosting place in the trees for the evening, their impossible s shaped necks and wide slow wing beats, the curl of their platform feet trailing behind. The water had turned that just after sunset shade of liquid blue grey metal, patterns of indigo and orange still sparkling on the quiet waves. My nephew and I sat in the front of the boat, marveling at how everything shifts so profoundly as the evening presses closer and we gazed back and forth from the north to the south end of the lake. We spoke about how both of us tend to focus on the dramatic display that happens at the sunset point. But often there are beautiful, more subtle changes happening on the eastern end of the lake, which that evening had become a seamless gradient of purples, blues and a turquoise as deep as southwestern jewelry. There are big flashy things that call and often claim our attention, but how good it was to settle back and watch the lake and sky in its entirety, to feel the shifting of the whole scene, take it all in and appreciate what was big and bold and bright and small and subtle, to feel the awe that bubbles up from the heart and the grins of delight and relief glowing upon our nodding faces.

I remember many times attending a party or gathering and being seated at a long banquet table where there was a lot of activity focused on what was happening at the head of the table (a speaker, a dignitary, the birthday boy or girl). Rarely do I first choose to be at the head of a table, but more often prefer to sit in the middle or at the quiet end, because there is often a quiet end of the table literally or metaphorically. There are conversations that can happen where most of the activity is focused, there are conversations that can only happen at the part of the table where the entirety of the scene can be seen and heard. There are conversations that can only happen at the quiet end, one-on-one with a kindred spirit, in lower heartfelt tones.

Fessing up, I am an INFP on the Meyer’s Briggs scale, which means I am an introvert who has mostly worked in an extroverts job. It’s one of the rarer combinations that is often shared by pastors, counselors, and I guess some poets and folk singers. It means I love love love people and places and my always surprising, changing outward life as a traveling musician and story teller of human possibility. But I also know that by nature, I “re-charge” in solitude. That I am deeply drawn too stillness and I know the essential importance of attending to my inner journey and inner work.

It feels like these days we’ve all been invited to a huge banquet table culturally. There is so much amazing, beautiful, enraging, concerning, bewilderingly crazy stuff happening. It seems as though there are countless entities vying for or claiming the “head of the table”, asking for our daily full attention with a million pings and notifications and screens saying, “hey look over here, you don’t want to miss this thing that will fill your head with fear or anxiety or FOMO.” When most of us would actually rather spend time at the middle of the table, with perspective and access to a balanced view of things and more inclusive conversation. Some of us long for the conversations that can only happen at the quiet end of the table, with a new or trusted friend. This includes those inner conversations and inner work that is easier to do away from the din of lots of outer hubbub.

I think about cultivating those conversations of the heart in times so filled with random and very intentional distraction. What does it mean to rest in my little boat and fall in love with that entire range of sky as the sun is sinking low? How shall I cherish what can only happen at the quiet end of the lake or table? How do I appreciate and thrill to the activity and color and glory rays coming through the clouds at sunset?

As usual…please feel free to share this post with friends or family you feel might appreciate the topics I write about and the conversations we are having here at The Gathering of Spirits. And as always…thank you for being the thoughtful community and individuals you all are!!!!!

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Practice:

1. Find a place to watch a sunset where you have a view of the sky in the east and to the west. Watch the sun go down, but remember to appreciate the moving and glow happening at the sunset point, but to take in the beauty and feelings that happen when noticing the entire range of color and sky. Be sure to breathe in and out a few deep cleansing, appreciative breaths.

2. Get a piece of white paper and crayons or colored pencils. Make a drawing or just color wash of a sunset if you were sitting in a boat, sunset to your right and the length of the full sky all the way to the east. When you are finished, lay it down, smooth it out and ADMIRE your work. Admiring is very important part of this practice :-)

Question

What do you think of when you think of conversations that happen (as an individual within ourselves, with friends, or community ) at the busy or quiet end of the table? What does if feel like to have conversations from the middle of the table? do you feel pulled in two directions, or do you like having more access to a wider perspective?

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One Inch Photos

On my walk….and fireworks :-)

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Tour Schedule

This summer I have a limited public tour schedule. But there are few fun upcoming shows. You can check my website tour page for more information and how to get tickets.

Tickets will go ON Sale for this fun show next week! Get your tix early. My Bloomington Shows sell out fairly quickly.