Sincerely....
And A Meditation On The Truth Of Connection
You can trust what I’m saying is pretty much authentic— well, because I’m a folk singer and I’m really really bad at being insincere.
I often think about my poor mother, who was good-hearted and loving, but private and intentional by nature — and called to raise a child born to be a poet/songwriter who would often say things like, “Let’s talk about everything and about our feelings. Let’s talk about stuff sincerely and openly—and in public…most likely in a song. To her eternal credit, she mostly rolled with it all, which is blessed in so many ways.
I know theater people who can strike a pose when asked directly, “Hey, are we heading into a surprise birthday party for me?’ and straight faced and convincingly answer “Naw, it’s just dinner with a couple of friends” and pull it off. I’m just warning you now, do not tell me about a surprise party until right before it happens.
Nope, I’m never going to be good at being insincere, its just not in the cards.
And so honestly, the truth is I’ve struggled this week holding the surrealness of this moment in history when everyday something new breaks my heart. I am angry and fear for our democracy as an authoritarian regime rolls forward like a tank. I can sincerely say that it’s felt very heavy this week.
I know there will always be differences in how we see the same painting or hear the same song. There will always be simple (or complex) differences in how we see the world and the best ways to do government. But the truth is the leader of the most militarily armed country on earth has not once but repeatedly threatened the genocide of an entire ancient civilization. This is not a difference of opinion. This is a war crime. It is also true this same leader often communicates, in the middle of the night, to heads of other countries about consequential matters of state in floods of unhinged social media posts and then post images of himself as Jesus, the Pope or wearing a King’s crown. This is not a difference of opinion. This is dangerous and unstable behavior. The truth is that people I love and respect support the cruelty and ravings of this man—and because I know they are such good people, I’m sincerely not sure where to place that in my heart.
And so I share this with you today, because I imagine there are days when you are also doing your very best to stay grounded in these strange and hard times.
I share it because this is when truth-telling is a great responsibility.
I share it because this is when strengthening the lines of community and connection are absolutely vital.
I share this because I do not want to be numb or disconnected from my joy or my sorrow.
I share this because the good news of the heart needs to be as daily and faithfully transmitted as the hard news of the world.
Last evening I went for a long walk in the woods with my dogs. I kept taking deep breaths. I let a few tears roll for all who are innocent, vulnerable and suffering in this world, allowing myself to feel the brokenness of the world and the beauty of the world.
It was then I reached a place on the path, bathed in soft light filtering through the spring green leaves. I stopped for a moment and did this short meditation for connection, courage and calm. It is a meditation I do occasionally. It helped greatly that day. I hope it helps you too.
I stood quietly and took relaxing deep breaths,
I tuned into my senses noticing the smell of the damp ground, the sound of the wood thrush and eastern towhee, the feel of the light breeze on my face and hands.
Then I turned my attention to the soles of my feet - after a moment I allowing my spirit to expand six inches into the earth below my shoes. After a moment or so, I let it expand a bit further, maybe 12 inches, then 3 feet, then 6 feet, then 12 feet.
Then I greeted the great interconnected roots systems of the trees. I let myself hear it greet me in return. I let my expanded spirit stay there awhile—grateful for that sense of being part of something larger than myself, something older and most certainly wiser.
Eventually I brought my spirit back to my feet, returning 6, then 3, then 1 feet, then six inches, until my spirit felt settled back in my body.
…and it was good.
This is when I would usually end this meditation. But last evening I added another piece.
I thought about my spirit expanding out in all directions, from my body and hands and head. I greeted the leaves and stones and moss and wild plants. I listened for them to greet me in return.
Then I reached out with my spirit to feel how I was connected to all the good things of this world—the people I love, the people I don’t know but sense their goodness in the ether as well. I reached out to the rivers and streams, to salt water and fresh, to deserts and forests, mountains and flat plains, to the sky and moon and stars. I greeted it all with love. I listened for it to greet me in return.
Then I allowed my spirit to sense and be connected to whatever is unending and sustaining, the sacred source of all things. I greeted all that Light with love. I listened for it to greet me in return.
I took a deep breath and brought my spirit little by little back into myself. I felt grateful for all the ways I am always connected to what matters, what is true and sustaining.
…and it was good.
As I continued my walk I felt better, my heart a little less heavy. These are hard times. That is the truth.
But we are not without resources, deep and strong connections, and the courage to keep loving this world.
Beloved, that is also the truth.
Practice
Try the practice above the next time you are outside. You don’t have to be in the deep woods - but being among trees or some place that contains natural things helps.
Question
What did this meditation on the truth- telling bring up for you? If you did the connection meditation, what happen, did you feel a bit more connected to what is good in the world?
Music Always Music
This the song “Help In Hard Times” which appears on my album The Beautiful Not Yet. Note: I’m thinking about reissuing this album in LP format this fall.
One Inch Photos
I was not the only creature who recently passed that way in the woods.
Concerts and Retreats
I have just a few public concerts in the next months as I will be focusing on recording the new album. But one new free concert has been added and I will be doing a week long retreat with my brilliant friend and colleague, Helen Blier, at Ring Lake Ranch I’ll be back on the road in the fall and winter. You can check out my full calendar at www.carrienewcomer.com/tour
Reminder for folks, in May I offer my bi-annual 30% off forever on new subscriptions! I know a supporting subscription is not for everyone, so there will always be free content here at A Gathering of Spirits. But a deep bow of gratitude to all the supporting subscribers. You make this creative endeavor possible.
Gift Subscriptions In May I’m also offering a 35% for one year Gift Subscriptions. So if there is someone you would love to give a springtime - just because - gift subscription here’s the link.
Yesterday morning I walked through the Memphis Botanic Gardens with 2 long-time friends, 1 of whom was here from out of town. The sky was its perfect blue self. The rose garden is ahhhh. I have a "rule" right now about not passing a magnolia tree without smelling at least 1 blossom. The leaves on the trees are a rich green--past the new-born green of spring but not yet wearied by our hot summer (except for a few maple trees which have red leaves even now)--so the woodlands area felt like walking under a green canopy. I didn't do Carrie's meditation, but I kept looking up at the leaves, noting where the sunlight touched a leaf directly making it nearly fluorescent, & stopping there for a few seconds to breathe the light in. Then I would catch up my friends to see what they were breathing in. I left the Garden feeling nourished & grateful. Yes, Carrie, connection is truth. And it is sustaining.
Thank you Carrie, as always, for these deeply honest reflections. You echo many of my own struggles. When it comes to people I love who continue to support political powers that are so clearly trying to take down the Constitution and the rule of law at home and around the world, my question is, "What does it mean to love them under these circumstances?" Time after time, I find that people like that in my life will say, when I present them with a few simple facts about what is going on—e.g., the number of detainees who have no criminal record, or the threats to our voting rights—will say, "Well, I didn't know that, but I don't think it's true, because if it were, I would know about it." As I look back on my 87 years, I see how time and again, people who loved me somehow managed to rescue me from my own ignorance. So I'm looking for ways to practice that kind of love for people who are flying blind in a world where so much depends on We the People knowing the difference between what's true and what's false, to say nothing of the difference between what's right and what's wrong...